JonesyLovesBlogs

So, if you’re reading this blog, then it’s likely you check out hectorandtodd.com or their podcast, Dangerous:Memories on a regular basis.  That being said, you might know that this week’s listener participation segment is a response to a seemingly simple choice: Han Solo or Indiana Jones.  I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again: You bastards.

Awesome googled picture aside, I’m not here to tell my choice (you’ll just have to tune in to hear the goods). I’m merely relating to you a funny scene that played in my head as I was thinking this whole thing through.  Let’s take a funkadelic fictional flashback back to a decade known as the 70’s….

Ohio Players’ Fire plays in your mind as we open on two bearded wonders…

Lucas:  I don’t know man, the test audiences REALLY aren’t responding to Blue Harvest right now, I mean I don’t understand what went wrong!  I mean I got lightsabers, son!

Spielberg:  There’s no WAY laser swords are going to be popular thirty years from now, and no one’s going to remember what a ‘light saber’ is.  And, no offense dude, but no one wants to follow around an old man and a whiny kid in a bath robe for two hours.  You need a better supporting cast, bro.

Lucas:  Well, what do you suggest, a giant fucking shark?

Spielberg: I’m just saying, you need to add in like some kind of cowboy/pirate that dudes will relate to and chicks will want to bang, ‘nough said.

Lucas:  And I suppose we give him a giant parrot as a side kick (sarcasm).

Spielberg:  (Thinks) Sidekicks a good idea, give him a big dog to hang out with.  Worked for Burt Reynolds.  And dude, Carrie Fisher is hot, they should bang.

Lucas:  Her and the dog??

Speilberg:  No!  Her and the pirate/cowboy, dude that’s sick!  Need to check yourself, what’s next with you, is nothing sacred?  Next thing you know the whiny kid and the earmuffs girl will be making out.

But seriously, if you don’t pick Indy, you’re probably as drunk as I am right now.